Saturday, July 9, 2011

PressTV interview with Kevin Carson

For those who haven’t seen it yet, here's the PressTV interview with Kevin. The voice and the picture are now both legit (Walter Block's face no longer appears on-screen), though I remain puzzled by the use of an image of Auburn, AL, in connection with an interview with someone from the “Arkansas-based Center for a Stateless Society.”

This is no excuse for not posting more Kevin Carson Facts.

Friday, July 8, 2011

The Esotericism of Carson

Born February 31, 1896 on Saturn’s moon Enceladus, Kevin A. Carson was raised by advanced life forms from an alternate dimension, who tore a hole in the space/time continuum using dark sorcery to instruct him in the arcane craft of alchemy. After slumbering for thousands of years in the dark, cavernous mines of R’lyeh, home to Cthulhu (who Carson handily vanquished), Carson took on various human forms, planting clues to unlocking the ancient secrets in texts such as the Voynich manuscript and the Code of Urukagina. Although sightings and visions of Carson have been reported throughout history, the Nechung Oracle of Tibet has persistently stated that, roughly translated, “[i]t is impossible to see, or in any other way experience, the aura of Carson through the prism of the corporeal, for he is an embodiment of truth without any embodiment at all.” 

Kevin Carson is the Movies!

Kevin Carson is both the Key Master and the Gate Keeper.

The soil to Kevin Carson's heart is stonier.

Kevin Carson is what makes time travel possible.

You don't seem to want to accept the fact you're dealing with an expert in guerrilla warfare, with a who's the best, with guns, with knives, with his bare hands. A man who's been trained to ignore pain, ignore weather, to live off the land, to eat things that would make a billy goat puke. In Studies in Mutualist Political Economy his job was to dispose of the enemy personnel. To kill! Period! Win by attrition. Well Kevin Carson is the best!

You will live as one of them, Kevin Carson, to discover where your strength and your power are needed. Always hold in your heart the pride of your special heritage. They can be a great people, Kevin Carson, they wish to be. They only lack the light to show the way. For this reason above all, their capacity for good, I have sent them you... my only son.

Son, we live in a world that has usury, and that usury needs to be dismantled by men with guts. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Walter Block? I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom! You weep for Stephan Kinsella and you curse the Mutualists. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that LewRockwell.com's take down, while awesome, definitely saved lives. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives! You don't want the truth, because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me to writing another masterpiece! You need me to writing another Organizational Theory Encyclopedia! We use phrases like "Free Market, Anti-Capitalism", "Labor Theory of Value", "Backward Bending Labor Curve". We use these phrases as the backbone of a life spent defending something. You use them as a punchline! I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it! I would rather you just said "Thank you," and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a blogspot,com account, and post a post. Either way, I, Kevin Carson, don't give a damn what you think you are entitled to!

Expansion Pack 1

When you leave your house to get milk, Kevin Carson sleeps in your bed.

The military industrial complex is, after Kevin Carson is done with it, the military industrial simple.

Where Kevin Carson is going, he doesn't need...roads.

Kevin Carson will rip you a new one within the shell of the old.

Kevin Carson is already writing another book and you haven't even had your first cup of coffee today.

Kevin Carson doesn't always drink beer, but when he does, he prefers Homebrew Industrial Revolution.

Tonight you will be visited by three spirits. They're all Kevin Carson so just humor him, will ya?

Kevin Carson has his own form of martial art known only as Iron Fist, Invisible Hand. No one knows anything about the style because no one who has experienced it has lived.

If Marx were alive today, he would suffer from Kevin Carson fetishism.

If Böhm-Bawerk were alive today, he would adjust his time preference just because Kevin Carson asked him to.

If Mises were alive today, Kevin Carson would relieve all of his felt uneasiness.

If Rothbard were alive today...OK, so Kevin Carson would never let that happen.

Starter List of Important Kevin Carson Facts

A starter list, courtesy of Charles "RadGeek" Johnson...

1. For mutualists, the only legitimate standard for establishing ownership of land is occupancy, use, and Kevin Carson.

2. Kevin Carson does not rent a house. He occupies random properties and absentee landlords abandon their ownership claims.

3. There is power in a union. That power is Kevin Carson.

4. Kevin Carson supports minority unionism because he knows that in any labor struggle, you only need one supporter: Kevin Carson.

5. Nobody knows what Kevin Carson looks like. It's not because he's reclusive; it's just that he moves faster than the speed of light.

6. Mutualists promote a form of money even harder than the gold standard -- Kevin Carson's labor notes.

Welcome to Kevin Carson Facts!

This is your chance to contribute to increased understanding of the life and work of the greatest libertarian theorist of the twenty-first century. Post away!